lads

is it possible for you to put all the posts in the three word game together to actually create a story? I think it would be rather interesting?!

Remember the word association thread that seemed to go on for months? Well, it's a bit like that, but not quite the same. I'll go first and start the ball rolling to see how much drivel we can all come up with. There once lived... a wonderful turd who enjoyed soup in sweaty y-fronts that didn't fit Bruce Forsyth's wife cause she was a fat whore who hated cock and loved cake eating competitions, so she eventually exploded and bits went fucking everywhere, but luckily,an enormous act of god dripped over her like a rash she was utterly elated, but completely covered in jizm. from Bruce Forsyth and his stinking wrinkly old balls. After the commotion the police were baffled with the lack of arrests and evidence that foul play might have something to offer the dead pigeon at the pensioners weekly ball checking medical session which is a good idea nowadays cos you can't be too careful when danger lurks in the skiddle and evil reigns supreme when penguins Kill pigeons because God told them to take steroids to bulk up so that they can fight off infectious diseases called Robbie Williams. However, fun loving tourists inserted huge objects into the Queen's repulsive german grid like fucking face the ugly royal british rowing society started a fight with Terry Wogan outside the pagoda of the mexican spicy bean curd. Suddenly an obese postman attached many tea bags to the fucking face of an albanian So far we have this... haha There once lived a wonderful turd who enjoyed soup in sweaty y-fronts that didn't fit Bruce Forsyth's wife cause she was a fat whore who hated cock and loved cake eating competitions, so she eventually exploded and bits went fucking everywhere, but luckily, and enormous act of God dripped over her like a rash she was utterly elated, but completely covered in jism from bruce forsyth and his stinking wrinkly old balls. After the commotion the police were baffled with the lack of arrects and evidence that foul play might have something to offere the dead pigeon at the pensioners weekly ball checking medical session which is a good idea nowdays as you cant be too careful when dander lurks in the skiddle and evil reigns supreme when penguins kill pigeon because god told them to take steroids to bulk up so they can fight off infectious dieseases called Robbie Williams. However, fun loving tourists inserted huge objects into the Queens repulsive German grid like fucking face. The ugly royal British rowing society started a fight with Terry Wogan outside the Pagoda of the Mexican spicy bean curd. Suddenly and obese postman attached many tea bags to the fucking face of an albanian... arse farmer called Delmilio Conquespink who had never stroked his chin lightly spat in maradonnas Mountain of coke and was executed For shagging geese with a huge multi chef attachment which was attached to the tats of Michael Winner and his extraordinary battery powered car which was driven towards upperby cemetry influenced by meths and contaminated soup but no croutons cause the french make house muzik wearing cheese helmets and arse pads in the garden of eden. Suddenly... everybody started screaming "Lets Get Naked" but nobody did bugger...oh well maybe next time said the vicar as he inserted religious scriptures up a donkeys arse sideways..........not nice!! George galloway is Masquerading as a Leprosy loving choirboy and a politician. But then the dirty scrote always Fingers his arse with fucking marmite love it or then sniffs it. it smells like the undercarriage of a virgin train it fucking stinks. However, the Russians are shit at law and order but good at cricket and vodka theyre often pissed off with ukraniun sandwich bars, posing with shit haircuts and kipper ties and cunting trilbys what do they need them for? perhaps gardening or fighting mental illness Which Can Be extremely damaging to poor little kittens Especially when you beat them with fuck off spanners and large mallets causing donkey blood to boil like Sperm. But recently, peace was achieved by masturbating quails with oven gloves and duct tape attacking Georgie Bush from the rear with a marrow and a blue bic, blood gushed from every orifice unlike free willy who only channels bovril from his big floppy testicles and their muck infested barse warts However, much sorrow was to follow as Kenny Everet died of A.I.D.S And it didn't end there his arse was manufactured by a drunken pie, who had liver problems of the eyes This is so far.. There once lived a wonderful turd who enjoyed soup in sweaty y-fronts that didn't fit Bruce Forsyth's wife cause she was a fat whore who hated cock and loved cake eating competitions, so she eventually exploded and bits went fucking everywhere, but luckily, and enormous act of God dripped over her like a rash she was utterly elated, but completely covered in jism from bruce forsyth and his stinking wrinkly old balls. After the commotion the police were baffled with the lack of arrests and evidence that foul play might have something to offere the dead pigeon at the pensioners weekly ball checking medical session which is a good idea nowdays as you cant be too careful when danger lurks in the skiddle and evil reigns supreme when penguins kill pigeon because god told them to take steroids to bulk up so they can fight off infectious dieseases called Robbie Williams. However, fun loving tourists inserted huge objects into the Queens repulsive German grid like fucking face. The ugly royal British rowing society started a fight with Terry Wogan outside the Pagoda of the Mexican spicy bean curd. Suddenly and obese postman attached many tea bags to the fucking face of an albanian arse farmer called Delmilio Conquespink who had never stroked his chin lightly, spat in maradonnas Mountain of coke and was executed For shagging geese with a huge multi chef attachment which was attached to the tats of Michael Winner and his extraordinary battery powered car which was driven towards upperby cemetry influenced by meths and contaminated soup but no croutons cause the french make house muzik wearing cheese helmets and arse pads in the garden of eden. Suddenly... everybody started screaming "Lets Get Naked" but nobody did. bugger...oh well maybe next time said the vicar as he inserted religious scriptures up a donkeys arse sideways..........not nice!! George galloway is Masquerading as a Leprosy loving choirboy and a politician. But then the dirty scrote always Fingers his arse with fucking marmite love it or then sniffs it. it smells like the undercarriage of a virgin train it fucking stinks. However, the Russians are shit at law and order but good at cricket and vodka theyre often pissed off with ukraniun sandwich bars, posing with shit haircuts and kipper ties and cunting trilbys what do they need them for? perhaps gardening or fighting mental illness Which Can Be extremely damaging to poor little kittens Especially when you beat them with fuck off spanners and large mallets causing donkey blood to boil like Sperm. But recently, peace was achieved by masturbating quails with oven gloves and duct tape attacking Georgie Bush from the rear with a marrow and a blue bic, blood gushed from every orifice unlike free willy who only channels bovril from his big floppy testicles and their muck infested barse warts. However, much sorrow was to follow as Kenny Everet died of A.I.D.S And it didn't end there. his arse was manufactured by a drunken pie, who had liver problems of the eyes. which could see sexually deviant martians from channel4 tv doing handstands near a bath of mentally handicapped giraffes with fucked necks and broken teeth their breath was made of biscuits with jam filling and iron filings and the magnetic horsemen of the apocalypse decided that the spice girls with stripes on shud fuck off and drink ammonia to help cure dolphins with cancer of the fin However, a thunderous illigitimate childs arse going by the unfortunate name of miss bull nose shat herself when 15 tonnes of curry they all decided it was futile like jackos child and general patois that sewerage would verbally flow from the mouths of a rabid badger and his frothy hot creamy coffee which he snorted but suddenly felt gary glitters hand extremely lubed up..... entering his arse but someone saw the lottery results glitter had won!!!!! everyone rejoyced by dancing around a greased up eskimo wearing ladies tights on their heads unwashed and smelly like gordon ramseys sea bass pie with blueberry eggshells and halitosis dressing right up him lightly toasted with fairy's wings topping with skin disease from belgian hookers dirty syphilitic holes like gary glitter's unwashed nonce hands up eskimos bums and vietnamese kids danced for food but were given avon samples by Professor Steven Hawking breakdancing world champion of the universe apart from uranus because it stinks of jizum milkshakes After Grandma accidentally shit herself.... near gateshead libary after reading the ancient scriptures of Stephen King. Meanwhile, bodger and badger massacred seventeen nuns with an egg-whisk and sharp knives from ikea, priced beyond their worth but were sale-items and the nuns started to rise from the dead and began to disco dance to spice girls greatest trumpet accidents 1997 people got hooked on heroin and kelloggs special K Ikea then got self assembly chairs and burned down the lighter factory the dismayed villagers ran in circles before being shot In The Arse with spud guns and launched green sticky buds at pamelas shitty nickers from the weekend after the dreaded shepherds of tinkerton unleashed the mighty broom handle of the unruley hypnotic custard eating lentils with extra cheese upon mountainous boobs belonging to cher after falling off captain scarlets underwater pubic gravy boat from algeria near Warburton-on-sea opposite the opticians just by the dentist run by saddam and his fat arsed wife, kermit fired ping pong balls from his dead dog's fanny which was riddled with magots and sausage rolls shoes from GLC with peep hole toes and no soles near the moles on the faces of death followed by your mum's after sucking off your dads dick which looks familiar said simon cowell in fancy bloomers eating raw cabbage chuggin Bud Light with louie walsh Spin the bottle now said chico i can fly just push me don't grab there! it's rotting away from the inside help me please! shouted chico the cardboard box designer . chico pulled down his Bananarama posters and inserted them in both nostrils whilst gripping his 'Granny porn' collection stained with glossy brownish spunk, from his stupid face it resembled a monk on acid with salad fingers and plastic hair HELP! shouted the solitary leper, who lost his legs and belly button in a poker game to russian sailors whilest badgering witness's did her nails The spanking rabbit Got very upset and burned down a homeless shelter filled with infected piss soaked tramps and illegal immigrants the flames licked the feet of Sting's incontinent Grandma who stank of stale farts and gone off tuna the stinky bastard tastes like chicken because she's old and eats eels the dirty cunt turned and smiled then spontaneously combusted and burned the old folks home down to the ashes bodies included what a shame hahaha laughed adolf twisting his stache and committing suicide whilst cupping his sweaty hairy earlobes under his bed by the kleenex thats better than andrex for cleaning spunk from the eyes and contraception injections. The Forgetful Raccoons stole the ket from the horses stables which filled my thoughts with raging panic.... suddenly three monks and a masterbating tapeworm began to run And Wriggle... Meanwhile, on the allotment the badger parade caused severe havoc by growing turnips in KFC, pizzahut and old shoes keep getting stolen. The leprechaun groomed his ginger beard and waved his finger befor inserting it into a donkey's neurotic anus. Elephants wearing scarves and thongs danced like greased-up male strippers (youd like that wouldnt you) aswell as singing boyzones greatest hits inthe style of a club singer with a lisp and a limp from being knee-capped by wild beavers backed up "when the goin gets tough.....the tough gets goin..... I've got something to tell you... I've got sumthin to say.... Am gona put this dream in motion.....Never let nothin stand in my way...Ooooo When the goin gets tough.....The tough get going........Yeah Darlin'...I'll climb any mountain...Darlin I'll do Anything..." Woooooooooo yeah...it screeched by an angry beaver called clive segal and loved cake eating competitions but always lost so smothered it over he's body and waited for the impending apocalypse to unleash the fucking mighty wrath of the thundercats and fat nonce red hand gang bang, mysteriously a fat, hairy trucker eating Big pies exploded, scattering filling all over walls smelling of beef and horse radish sauce. Where is my cuppa tea and crack pipe? for my daily drug fuelled shoplifting adrenaline binge marathon that are now known as snickers but not by Old Man Davros just near rhyl where pumpkins mysteriously turn into umpa lumpa's pet yaks pajamas with fluffy pink pubic hair shaped like a horn on a unicorn with crap stuck on both sides of its hairy big cack hole with gunk dripping In Luminous Green down the legs slimer from ghostbusters looked the same colour as my snot and your neigbour approached the curb and bit it the stupid cunt he broke his teeth and replaced them with tiny tic-tacs only two calories if taken orally as anally stings like papercuts on your eyelids or sores on badger's big toes like athilites foot full of puss and whiped cream with a 99p strawberry split flavoured condom & big banana to fill the gaping hole!. when a huge pheonix flew over head and took a Baby From A pikie camp site Help! She screamed. fuck off shouted while dusting lint and polishing mint from a nonce who'd just been caught with his dog in bushes and balls in someone's sweaty palms the police intervened and arrested him for selling illegal spiked ice cream with heroin sprinkles and GHB Flakes to school chavs and young girls wid fake tan and naive ideas Were Let Off the hook when four raving lunatics joined Spiral Tribe And Set Up their own grandma wid tekno jackin' and buttered scones cuppa tea and big fat willys only 1" long but well formed like my tits that were squirted all over tadger She went down couldn't open eyes she found in her stolen handbag small zoo animals and a turtle Head Popping Out like a cheeky stinky brown monkey called king kong the hairy vandal who lived in... his own muck Swung From The trees in the old folks home near the groovy But Slippy Riverbank because of all monkey spunk and dog shit everywhere with grass poking out the sides while getting eaten by a massive pillsbury doughboy cloned by an evil pete burns lookalike who ate a? Massive Dougnut With jaffa cake turd swilled down with boddingtons extra cheesy dwarfs disco piss expresso. the dwarf finished himself off over jenna jamesons kitchen table when her breasts exploded over ron jeramies porn tash, then pulled a vibrating Easter Egg From the bunnys basket and hopped round without any feet like a weeble that wobbles but Wont Fall Down!!! (nice one) meanwhile incy wincy the spider...legs.. protruding from a fat birs ass which smelled of blue vein cheese from tesco supermarket before it collapsed into the river ribble, where the Salmon & Trout float like turds and used tampons expand to the size of elephants in a china fucking teapot with Japanese Tea & wanky rugby biscuits listening to punk whilst fingering their neighbours sweaty arses & Armpit Licking with Jeremy Paxman & Michael Winner on a boat Sailing Out To hesketh newmarket with cockles & crabsticks picked by immigrants with webbed feet and curly hair called Mick Hucknall the ginger cunt with bejewelled teeth and diamond pubes filled with crabs and mushy pead horse bollock soup with testicle croutons (like in circle bar!) served with misery by jesus christ and Noel Coward upon the piano and flugel horn blown by roman from his bowels . Suddenly the door.... started to cry! after being attacked by mick jagger and Keith Moon with a drumstick covered in rotten cabbage and faeces of shitmat's mother when she deliberately splits in half A Yuppie sort with a file-a-fax & Platinum Pen and matching shoes & a crewcut got onto a open top bus and toured londons best childrens homes To touch a small african vegitation with soapy suds Up My Nose and my eyes cockeyed & red like cilla black suprise suprise the voice of graham olympic gold medalist paralyzed by wombles from wimbledon, near Orinoco's nasty kebab house in turkey basting lunatics with massive clown shoes with no laces pompom balls and armed nuclear devices aimed at donkeys & arab arses and returned ji-hads for being faulty and kept sticking onions in eyes of gold fishes scabby scales with brillo pad shoes stripy flares and a macdonnalds hat hip hip Hoooooray shouted the fries wheres my gherkin.... the devils spawn spread over yonda.. int back-of-a honda The Black Sheep came out as war mongering infidels shouting DURKHA DURKHA ze germans are here "Quick, hide the... polka dotted sheep befor they get the acid worked! mmmmmmmmmmmmmm said the peasants as they walked through the many fields of poppys in afganistan & Albino Frogs decended upon the War Lords Leeft with his cousin avvy and auntie Mertyl and dog spot! all tragically died Death By Drowing was the verdict & Sparrow Eating was the punishment bail wasnt granted so incarceration was the only answer Meanwhile, seventeen pagan pigions danced the fandango and sacrificed goats For Their Offle and their squirrles eating walnuts & sharing stories of the buskers ghosts piano playing morons who licked tables covered in fags and ash-tray hats ,cheesy pork pies With Poseies & wasps in ovens big brown baps with colslaw and Frogs Legs Wrapped in dead skin from the feet of Benedictine monks to googly eyes of drunk Jesus christ mary mother of the chosen leaders of the almighty jewish empire belonging to the triads of china at chinease buffet food poisioning crap buffet style restaurants with small plates and mental Glaswegians chewing dry spinach and drinking Buckfast with raspeberry pavlova whilst injecting heroin like scottish stereotypes meanwhile, southern fairries ate jellied eels and drank shandy while cockney monkeys wanked in tyres & swung off their own nobs while turd curling at the olympics 2076 from bagdad via satellite link via noahs ark through Jesus' chin which knocked out the power to bin laden's caves (u feeling better mate? got some flyers out this afti. walked by faith and rach burst out crying, i gave hr the fingers! still got a lift home off her though) and caravans superstore (feeling a lot better, going to try and get up town later on to see if I can hand some more out. Let's hope I don't meet anymore strange people in chip shops who are convinced they know me). where del boy (if ur coming up town, give moi a bell and i'll help,also started to design talking flyers for all the twats in carlisle that cant read) cropped his puebs and made pube love with his dead Uncle Albert His pathetic whispy beard fell off whilst getting felched into marleen's mouth with a straw and a cheesy wheelbarrow up the weally wonky wroad with william winchester a sword welding jamacian uphill skier who couldnt resist & squid slayer bob said everyone wear square pants like sponge bob Nutty man called clive the dangerous fire eating slink next to the paper mill when lezzy the trooper farted and set the house alight papermill even engulffed the cow feild the pigs squealed incoming pigeon squadron DUCK!! they chirped.... before spontaneously combusting on a waterski stolen by Sting and his amazing back door indian peace pipe emporium where the natives wore balaclavas and and carried swords famous for beheading bumble bees, similar to bumble boos their all jews that wear dresses like arabs with disdasha.....Ogal....Tagiyah.... Originally posted by lezzy:disdasha.....Ogal....Tagiyah.... (white robe) (black head band) (white cap) uno momento porpavor the crazy mexican killed his wife .....death by suffocation.... using his arse deadly potent farts filled chiquetos face with brussel sprout sauce and beechams jiz flavoured powder in lezzys hair crispy & flakey bits fell off into elvis's grave hu hu hah like a nonce mumbled elvis, his hair collapsed into a pile of ash while shaking his todger at dale wintons orange face and jizd owch my eye and it stung like a fucker The man then got some tissue for the discharge befor it got out of control and stuck to a nun's face she wiped it clean with her hard crusty knickers before sniffing and getting herself wet , dripping straight from and fisting her immensely smelly looking furry fuzz flange filled fromage frais forthwith from France full, frothy and fabulously.......... resembling creamy nipples pink not black with mouldy bits and brail reading...... suck and pinch your testicles cowboy! quick shouted jennajameson into the bushes and treat me to an icecream up the anus with raspberry sauce and sprinkles of dried armadillo dung like dime bars ought to taste after several attempts at masturbating otters smashing your windows using crusty vomit and elephant cocks And They All Lived Happily Ever After... The End. fuckin' hell... glad thats over. Until one day they met brian potter using a zimmer rocket to travel to the USA to get cookies and cup cakes with rich tea and maple syrup for her bum. Because the doctor diagnosed ringpiece syrupitis and feminine itching ,big hairy warts with syphillitic walruses masses of hair inserted into its toe nails, with pliers & nails before being shot rectally with manfat with oats & hunny used for texture and taste, like when bummed by wendy millor, who like fannys arse when bent over the ironing board and forced to suck her feet and nuzzle her breasts, and insert her head up a fucking chimney which the crows wouldnt move from until they smoked seventeen green spliffs and shat on the queens head on a pound coin!!..... ........when bananaman raped his dog he slipped onaskin (sorry) and shattered his left ventricle, somehow. then his bird pulled out her big wobbly tits and squirted milk with much glee over a wall into a vicar's duck pond, when the pope visited and shit himself (sorry, i never got to voodoo on sat, finished work at 10.30 went to knotty's doo and then had to take the rach home as she was ill, taxi has to stop 4 time between town and stanwix to let her be sick!) wearing a dress while listening to.... Extreme Noise Terror mixed with scotch egg and Cliff Richard and richard cheese with a smattering of iluminous flem and bowel cancer provokin pills thaT give you tits and brown nipples and massive haemorrhoids that taste of well... shit obviously dried onto the . the king of cheap carpet fittings with shit pile and worn thread unlike this one...... which is burnt and mouldy like blue stilton cheese wrapped around a mouldy barbed wire fence surrounding government property like the top secret weapons & geneticly modified biscuits That Taste Shit!!! Once they'd finished like dog's arseholes Riddled With Worms and missing watches that sang hymns past tuesday above past tuesday above grown mens genitals and executed pensioners , "renew" they shouted , but bombs came and broke hearts and severed limbs for cheap thrills whilst writing letters to the queen calling her a A pompous german tax robbing whore with inbread family who are lizards and eat shit out of donkeys prolapsed rectal passages with their fingers in a douchebag scented prat spray called vagi-fresh for rotten twats which cost £60 at cost price from rich skiddle's very secret collection of plastic twats (yeah 1000 posts) generously wrapped with saliva juice from Michael Winner's Aunty who made tea using bits of granma moon's minge after digging her arsehole out of the fucking cemetary . Alfie cried loudly... "dirty old bitch" then rimmed Kat with Shake-n-vac, but licked biffin bridge as a result he got herpies and ran away but it hurt and fell off like cauliflower buds.... with cheesy sauce and bbq dip flavoured petrol pumps full of diesel and deisel flavoured petrol ov course!!!!! interesting............... said the seagul as it flew through jelly made from vimto and umbongo aswell. Ssssslurple the Purrrrrrrrrrrple..... headed womb broom soon lume fume In Poets Corner........... loooneey was a loner a geek who had a boner she cudnt shift........ or couldnt lift..... without help from..... the pope whom sucked the end.. of Saddam Hussein's fucking revolting and very grossly mis-shapen big toe......! then gurning almost like hes sucking lemons wheadon & tadger.... owned a green badger Wheadon in a wrong scary acid-trip told his mother i screwed your cats sisters dog EEeeeeeeeek!! catdog will take over the world...So Tadger Originally posted by loooneey:world...So Tadger Could lick his Own Armpit....WHICH contains deadly pathogens. & fungal infections like his toenails which curled up and formed tiny balls of rock vietnamise villagers rioting against the hedgehog infestation. Veet those hogs.... yelled the scary cat wig maker.... while furiously yanking at his enormouse moustach & beard. was ripped off leaving raw flesh hanging down from the chin of a fat wanker suffering from A.I.D.S Which he caught injection heroin from a monkey's anus which had worms and was slack cos the pummelling administered by medical teams across the timeless worlds of Chipping Sodbury on a warm, wet fanny of sasquatch with the texture of cheap leather substitute, full of dead cat skin mingled with juices from Moira Stewart & richard dyer to make up three blind camels with lumpy humps and massive toes with gangree & athlete's camel toe smells of warm tuna pasta bake & sweetcorn with flakes of skin & Crusty Scabs peeled from the the naval to the kneecap of a gray lepord with testicular cancer and hairy eyebrows before it died and went to burn in hell for raping young Llamas and cattle & filming it. and showing it to the police the tit wanker grabbed his coat & waddled out with milky hands from milking goats from the ears nose and throat infection...hurt like a torn banjo blood, puss everywhere even on the the back of the dwarfs hairy little scabby legs Wrapped Round His own fucking ears With Pickled Onions and horse radish gonads with peppered overly large nipples an massive gash containing the population of China & quite possibly more than but less than what's more aswell as rats, and mighty squirrels with their nuts bouncing in the Warm Winters Wind which doesn't exist Unless Its Summer or perhaps spring? yummy lamb chops taken from goats Membrane And Blood.. fed to cows who eat shit the dirty cunts flapped about cos they were loose extremley old and scabbed to fuck with jucies and and scabby scabs which fell off leaving terrible scars that protrude ever gracefully from the back of a lorry with immigrants hiding in the boxes covered in baked bean juice Hp not Heinz..... you fucking scumbag wheres my hat it fell off my head when you dismembered it! with a spoon ya crazy foooooooool... said Mr T who noticed his ham salad was dripping with sea men and a big dollop whale shit which stank like a pile of shit obviously! Eat me now or i will flash my big bare arse To John Major who fooked his wifes arse hard!!! then split her into 6 bits and ate her.!!!! before fucking Edwina curried her and fucked nasty eggs with chicks in that are dead and smell like dead chick corpses & lidle chicken as well as dislocating my neck and twisting it so violently that my head exploded Splatterin Brain Everywhere onto my dress even my underwear and the upholstery springs caught my Depressing Cunt And it completely split his arse hole in two.....This morning i shit and it hurt It Was Green !! because I'm ill shakes & sweats the violent hamsters caught up with the meek mice chopped their tails and toes off. Which wasn't clever However, killing cats was completely fine Because There Was no whiskers available or tom tit anywhere, but when I exploded everywhere it made a incredible mess on his mum's matress covered in spunk from the dog with 3 legs and severe heart problems resulting in chickenpox. of the chin and a big Red flea bite on the arse of his pet mosquito called Desmond Desmond owned a unsuccessful dating agency which failed beacause he fucked all the applicants with his adapted foot-pump and some socks made of cheese from yeti's crotch that smelled like brei cheese, aids was prevalent throughout The kingdom of sexual deviants and raging rabid roosters with mental health issues like all These twats i am being made to work with kill them all With rusty old sheriff's badge and put cactus's up on the shelf to fall on their stupid heads ,the fucking mongies drove to spain covered in pricks... he dripped, shouting Fuckin wankers are Covered in jelly and have ruined My Ice Cream!!! so I decided to take a photograph of my Deformed friend Eric naked & freakishly OH dear! whats That! coming over the love mound.....? is it a Cat ?No a.... pickled pumpkin perhaps? maybe a gherkin???? Nope, it's a vertical bacon sandwich. frothing with moip In Malt bread.....! and laced with Ket and shrooms Yum Yum....thats ruined my head for a month!!! Impetuous idiots implode with using copious amounts of sweet nectar from bastard reproducting flowering plants!!! Fuck of RAIN.... you are rubbish little portugese cunt. was hanged by a Pubic plat and then burned By Neil Kinnock. wearing a wig Made from pubes plucked from his black hairy arse which was covered In plukes and wee goblin jizz matter & Puke! his hat was really really shit but matched his flowery dress with Stilettos and thong for salsa classes with beelzebub himself His evil disciples... Baked a cake a special cake wid sweaty nads.... and big brown curly turds with multicoloured tag nuts and bolt on's or strap ons the size of a black mans big rubber lips like a dingy lost at sea side resort, silloth. the lido was covered in shite from the uncontrolable bowels of Uncle Alberts festering armpit which had been rubbing against Festers sweaty swollen crotch due to mastrubation with some penetration from the daleks anal prober which broke on entry Originally posted by discofriscoal:broke on entry this shit thread leaving a nasty taste in bubblebums filthy shemale mouth as it purrrrrred and exploded at a very high impact knocked its head clean-off before finally landing on top of his aunties old moth ridden twat Meanwhile the buckfast making monks laughed at disabled children whilst drunkenly masturbating in their faces the horrible cunts I enjoyed it but the police arrested them for running a brothel Wid Fat Titted hunchback ugly fucks with skin flaking from their chins luckily for them Russian scientists had invented incredibly useful Skin Rejuvination Cream made from badgers bollocks & urine that irritated the Fuckin Life Outa small chineese monkeys wid baboon arses and camel toes pulled from giraffes two front teeth before being smashed against a glass panel and beaten to a pulp. Ah ha! shouted Prince Charles as he spunked into the Queen's mouth which upset Camilla because she's ugly and eats minge when holidaying in A disused bus-shelter AND smoking fags whilst begging for Tabloid paparazzi to buy his kidneys Off Russian Mafia bosses whilst feltching Mother teresas gash... A bum cigar fell from her anal passage and She ate it Using Her Fingers In Bali they Found an amazing Rice Field Under the sea, where mermaid & nemo's cutlery was polished By obsessive-compulsive jellyfish Raving Radically In their mums pants itched like mad when the crabs clawed her skin... right to fuck & infested her chin beard with crab shitness and piss stained undies floating around the river thames in a egg cup the daft twats fell deep into herpes, scabies, mice faeces which itched like buggery before It Was Smeared all over my grans hairy chest and she laughed at tiger deaths. While Stomach Infested parasites ate away at his intestines which fell out all over the fat womans face... and her monster rolls of flesh protected her from the gargantuate deermonkeys from Chippingsodbury and was defeated by Mr. MUstaffas giant curly moustache & his massive hands that were dripping With Spunk Which came from his Extra Curvy Cock after slamming it into a dog's ear and out into a cat's twitching pussy then he washed it with turps & boiled his balls in salt water for a laugh then skinned them.... and sold it for a wrap of dog shit. Which he pumped into the dog which then pissed on jenna jameson big round tits she had and the flappiest flaps the fucking whore of fucking babylon. "What was that" someone utterly confused shouted as they fucked a goat behind a shed near the railway where tim threw stones & coins!!! what a cunt He Was, Especially inept at everything but looked good in womens underwear and raw sewage. (has anyone ever come across cooked sewage?) which smelt very (nope...who wud wana cook it?) like mushroom soup with pickled onions and shit...obviously Squirted From His mouth explained the cockamanie squirrel to an irate tortoise Who Ate Snails and read newspapers upside down so he went blind And Chopped His mother's head off with a massive bowl of peanuts and bombay mix which burnt & scalded the neckline of suicide bombers In Central London while Brazilian backpackers climbed Great Gables while sniffing pants stolen from Mrs Twadge. But she had a backup and then died on the way to an Indian head massage party but small tree-frogs attacked the ninja's uncle by forcing sea-urchins up his his anal passage which iched like 80's Porn stars Magnum PI style tash until it exploded and gizzum flew into the unknown out onto the Escape Pod - Yoda's.... feet stank, but he could count. his genital warts on both hands spread upwards to his wankers moustache The dirty shecker ran around aimlessly swing his pants like Fred West wall cavities which shocked the world into crisis talks about shit electro-house And Bats Wings!!!!! they all decided that elf's could eat chocolate eclairs before their dinner of Super Noodles and cats piss before getting ill with mad cows and big pink Polka Dot Spots!!!! The accidental death of Lou Diamond-phillips wasnt an accident it was infact a deliberate attempt to destabilise Mongolian foreign policies, which involved inserting cucumbers and blue pointy nipple twisters, up some thai orphans abused, stinging, blood-red piss gushing from a monkey's fiveskin followed by virgin owner Richard Branson paying his own company three billion dollars under the pretense he's saving the fucking planet , fuckin over-sized gnome self made tho..... rich fookin twat egotistical fucking arsewipe adjective laden fuckwit. irksome fucking scrote picking mole eating crabs out of Tim's fucking eyelashes. Fran molests Greek tim lookalikes, verily because he's jealous ov man boobs the fucking cunt should kill him. By Eatin His mother's womb before defecating on his right ventrical through his scrawny frame Then turn our attentions to killing botch dwelling sweaties and Stanwix snobbery due to FICKLE animal shagging toerags with no respect sheeps arseholes or bulging pig lips Dripping Jazz Matter and gespatcho soup hater of Somalians and stale bread eating blind swordsmen Acid Filled Guts stink of shit let's leave alone the riotous turnips parsnips rule ok!!!! fucking inbred wankers chav v's redneck..... goat shagging philanthropy and monkey tossing funnier than cabers tossing pillocks who only toss monkeys in rope swings with sticks and red crash helmets high in monosaturates but good for killing fungal infections on magic mushrooms wearing slippers and Smoking Herbs That detonates serious psychosis of twelve manatees. Becoming Extinxt Due to excited bakers. drinking Midori from tim's removed testicles. causing severe friction putting them back on his chin whilst kicking Fran to a pulp!!!!! and laughing heartily and smoking crack with a vicar who abuses children and gets away with slapped wrists from the pope who bums jews and packs of cigarettes went to latvia & ate eggs from the latvian chicken farm which taught albanian counting to backward Turks while eating twats and being shat on once again in perfect unison the flags flew but the people were in-bred and moved to Slaggyford where flappy fannies ruled the streets & cock sure Neanderthals wearing clogs danced to medeival pan bashing & spoon bending evil For Halloween Ghouls with walnuts attached and quite pissy and crusty wid meat helmets on hanging baskets when bed's far better cos sex wee's easy to mop with flashy tashes and bendy legs like barbie & ken but not plastic which is fantastic when melted onto your gran's face which was sat in Prince's crotch and Big holes formed in the egg yolks which came from space via Mikes bollocks which were saggy due to teabaggin.... sleeping goats whilst Eating Sheeps Shit whilst cooking sausages on Acid in a portaloo swordfight at king henrys sandpaper massage parlour Through the door and out the anal passage, squirted with white sticky backed plastic and a big rubber cock for pleasuring her tight little hairy nostril hole as well as her massive cunt which was cavernous and fucking stank like a pickled fossil of shit with a dabble of liqid acid which brought psychosis so i killed everbody with a big throbbing red helmet that the germans gave me after being caught wanking a poodle lipstick with fervour whilst fucking hitler's mangled dead corpse and laughing heartily in gourbels ghia whilst eva brown popped david jacksons bike tyres with a fat orange Nipple Twister Which dangled from his chelsea boots he wore whilst shaggin sheep in pink wellington boots cowboy hat and shouting 'sesh on' & threes up.... threes right up my arsehole with sand as lubricant to hide warts on your hoop da la hoop with sticking plasters on bum cheeks with your balls in my mouth... for teabagging fun with a teapot, and salty aftertaste from the meaty platter of gorilla who die from ingrowing arse hairs and firey herpes in falopian tubes.... and testicle glands wid fungus mixed with agadoo and the paki dish spinning gracefully from his mothers twat which was moist with morning dew and fucking moip and waft of pork pie soup shitty horrible giblets from gutting the carcass de sade with an onion and brussel sprouts right up the new orelans levees when the banks of the river shit their pants and went bankrupt which was terrible just frightfully terrible really, really awful but strangely funny and vaguely disturbing fondue pastie bricks. Fabulous rock cakes were guzzled by ivor the incredible indelible edible madrible monkey mandrake monsoon buffering buffuets buggery concealing considerable cutlery in the kitchen of poor alliteration which failed its seventh literacy test on june 8th because it was scripting Gordon Ramsey and his woeful swearing and bad attitude toward waiters made of bostik. and carpet scratchings which scratch carpets and dig trenches whilst stimulating clerics orally, anally, forcefully with buttered fingers and fucking Croatians fucking the job for poor Albanians green fanny snot after horrendous outbreaks of genital warts infested womanising bastards scabby fucking charlatans of massive proportions who ate pies and talked bollocks without actually knowing the price of cinamon shitty eggnog the bunch of vertically challenged nomads who each had a friend called kiss me kate *sorry who are the new people? - say hello in another thread?* who once kissed Latvian vodka drinkers who had big handlebar moustaches and obscenly crooked colons which meant that they walked funny a bit like elderly cyclists without Incontinence pants that leak very badly and stink like they fucking should which is not very pleasant for passing motorists with their windows open whilst wanking violently To Bohemian Rapsody and fiddling with Tom Cruise's arsehole whilst whistling dixie cheese, piss and other folk songs by straw munching bearded paedophiles in fasionable tweed thongs with cork attachments like stupidfucking Australians Meanwhile Wogan anticipated gaby roslin on her rag week with a great splash of paint mood swings and increased tampax profits the company rejoiced at being soaked in red sputum the pervy fetishists with hairy palms and bad eyesight which did them in, when attempting mutual bukkake appreciation on unfortunate ladies watching awfwedersein pet with sticky eyes and bad tempers lots like tim suddenly killed Fran with grass blades... because he's soft due to beer intake. THE END. was nigh for all mad dudes brandishing sharp cutlery that ouzed charisma like pussy boils and dick cheese fetivals in africa where the locals partied all night but stank by the light of daybreak, so they embraced lepers like aids infested mangos with flappy skin flappy like pancakes your mother made and shat on the dirty bastard with quale snot right up his fluffy japs ear into a frothing whirling mad dervish helmet that had three large prongs and a wonky fluffy chin strap with lentil attachments and runner beans with extreme fatigue needing a massage from A.I.D.S riddled red arsed baboons with cancerous mouths and curly teeth and severe malnutrition with cauliflower ears the filthy bugger was a sorry little midget gem the fucking cunt who cried lots of broken glass from the cock whilst prodding the monkey's shitty passage (THIS WILL NEVER EVER DIE!! POWER TO THE THREE!!) with its forefinger and a carrott Up its arse until it stank like Tim's crotch which wasn't as bad as Fran's lame hippy haircut cried little Timmy ;) who pitied Fran and his excellence in complete denial of utter mediocrity he told himself no more being nice to eejits they're too clever at insurance scams and trolley dashes whilst holding small but perfectly formed crumbled ferrets plop and Brian May masturbating over a copy of this months gardening weekly which was shit like Mika's new manafactured voice guage the fucking eunuch with no testicles because that's what wankers like him should have done time in prison for raping dogs and recording it for later wankathons and crisp eating with long hair Upstairs & Downstairs if you know What I mean :D but thats cheating I have no idea what you are going on about young man who eats snails and bird shit all mixed together make a very nice gravy sauce to pour ontop of grandma's chin in between bristles and cabbage smells which are not particularly pleasant when auntie arrives from fucking the pope ooh the shame and chafed holes in her skirt from too much reliance on clergymen and father ted shagging necrophiliac weirdos and pole dancing clowns with leprosy and free tickets to lice circus and fairground nits cousin of pubes the stuntman mouse called Mr Jengles Bifter Rambo III who would do anything for peanuts baccy and matches to anally force feed milk up the japs eyes.... of ferocious camels humps, which were surprisingly pleased. However, the egyptian grocer fucked the Suez right royally in all sorts of hey and other greetings Of Total Misplacement rattled through cavernous earlobes of Lineker the footballing gnome of all hallowed order of psychotic walkers crisps eating backward talking buddhists with a fettish for wanking and crying at the same time whilst asking alan shearer to finger their dead dogs and three bush babies set off to seek fame and cookies with a lantern of shit with a detachable moustache and matching cheese and buiscuits covered in shit flavoured strawberry pie with blueberry muffins and cow pie next to a big combine harvester which was broke into 1200 fragments and kicked about a small giraffe with big bogies and no neck so found it hard to breath in exhaust fumes by anal means by using Turkish delights made in the outer perimiter of elchappos arse and it stank worse than Turkey from bernard matthews bird flu factory west of Egypt upon a pedometer sized, dwarf's pube which is quite an amazing sight when your from a blind society for pilots and bigots and piglets wearing Nazi uniforms and nazal clippers near adolfs pattio drinking pims with flamboyant crossdressing gaylords from ipswich's eppicentre west of egypt decided to go uptown girl,living on the dole decided to give Judaism serious thought because atheism stinks and so do people from carlisle who haven't washed for six generations of deformed babies and their homes were demolished by Gay Germanic Gerbils gabbering to gabba whilst punching a jewish militant muslim preaching mixed messages While bumming pigs and shouting "YES" i love robbie! & Shaun Ryders teeth and jannet street-porters saggy loose labia tastes like vinegar Just ask Les Dennis! after he's eaten a fucking abacus out for the night on ketamine and general violence with wrong-cocked quadraspazes on bouncy castles with abnormal paraplegic sight seeing instruments on confused camels with complete disregard for clerical assistants after peeling their face right off with lemon sorbet and sherbert lemons covered in razor blades. Meanwhile, in outer Mongolia, the albino goat ate Vanessa Feltz out and was sick with complete joy when she squirted on her baggy old fucking flaps Meanwhile, in Bolton, Zombies began eating reddars high score before dying again painfully and slowly due to pox and being runover By a milk float delivering vodka to the queens mother in Bognor Regis whilst the locals jogged with cows shit smeared on his fat face looking for reasons to eliminate all with death defying MC Hammer pants filled with lice Then, from nowhere a big grizzly sausage dog called Bobby the ballsack ran upto a Big round tree and said hey I'm gonna piss now get me some crumpets! Then it rained pies & pasties from pedigree chum serving cats wearing bongos for earmuffs. the daft cunts Meanwhile, Keith Chegwin got really drunk stripped off naked & did the truffle shuffle like that bloke out of goonies before being arrested for bumming otters. The other cast now do porn but only at weddings and barmitvas for jewish goats Their act includes "the jimmy sideways" & sand lubricated anal beachball popping angst and painful misery plus some noshing. They even let martyn taylor in to drag rich away from the ugly bird with braces. "Don't cheat" cried the staypuff marshmallow man who was cheating by putting three fingers up his rusty sherriff's badge and screamed loudly "Only three fingers just fist me" Russell Grant was happy to. And then suddenly he just exploded , a dog lapped up his splooge then sat beside rod, jane and freddy who began to moo like donkeys. Meanwhile on Mars the sequel to Mr Nanny with the Hulkster the epic involving the Hulk pondering pva sniffing legacy with a fat tube of crack and fine looking network rail zebras without any legs It was destined to bomb commercially like this thread and tadgers bum exploded in a fountain of madras fountain of madras And hot poppodums And hot poppodums you sad cunts you sad cunts and hippy yobbos walking dogs on Greenham Common Park whilst masturbating furiously To Songs Of Praise. And the Gospel whilst barking incessantly shovelled his excretia on the pope who cried "more" blamonge please mate blamonge please mate blamonge please mate once wil do andy! once wil do andy! Burn neds burn taking down nedsville town burn neds burn burn down to the ground 3 words only you silly monkey wearing a trilby made from goat ...k.nob bummed andy to death. the end Or was it? chappo can't count... or make sense of fat hens fucking fat bitches licking my nipples whilst furiously masturbating over this thread and squinting badly a Wickerman hero who bummed cows and sweaty pigs but very nicely tossed the boar over the moon and twinkly stars caused mayhem when the 3 stoogies wanked into the sperm bank in matching cat outfits with swollen knackers after accidental injury walking the plank and falling over onto Neptunes Trident ooh the pain...... shouted Jesus after his loyal disciples flicked his tedds with rusty fucks with rusty fucks and some repetition it's Groundhog Day without Bill Murray In further news we report that all the trumpets shat it today shat it today and left a steaming great turd in my mouth spit it out all over the neighbours fluffy cat and wipe it with the hamster before stamping them with Royal Mail Special Delivery post that gets lost In West Brom main sorting office home of transsexuals and shit postmen with bum grapes that bleed profusely and got bigger till they burst and out popped Morecombe & Wise the dead bastards are funky zombies with comedy timing and gammie legs stupid fucking leprosey always gets in the way of having good skin that doesn't flake off into your mother's homemade soup hmmmmmmmmmm leprosy soup with herb croutons and a copy of Geoff Capes biography cleverly entitled "Fifteen Gay Rules" it was an Awful read but.... she carried on got some tips of the felt roofing game, with Bruce Forsythe and big daddy with rod hull wearing Emu's heart as a tight thong. the dead twat said the ariel wasn't even broke but his arse was suffering badly from clinical depression of the ear His psychiatrist said ... You soft cunt just kill yourself you raging bertie now fuck off the end. was nigh, said a Jesuit miserablist before being charged with grape fiddling and fruit fixing to jesus' forehead the fruit-faced fuck. shouted shit bolloks at the pope whilst smoking crack the Ham Shanker was furious when the mice shat pancakes through a broken wind turbine that broke after Sir Jimmy Saville fucked it good Cos Jim Fixed-it right up the poo poo shoot of his dead mothers pet cat. imaginitively called Tiddles stupid, stupid Tiddles Played with his mice exterminator kit called 'Fucking Devestation' he bought from IRA collaborater, Dermot O'Nutcase the local fat, idiotic subungulate gay sea cow that often licked his own balls when visiting his dead mother's grave i cant believe this is a 123 pages longwhich was covered with lots of germs and piss And is over 1 1/2 years old..which sprouted 'Germoline' scented cats matter perfect for your dead grans garden before she shaved her anal beard right off because grandpa was furious with the clingy winnets on his tongue after licking grandma's arsehole. Pleasingly, she orgasmed twice the sexy bitch grabbed her dildo from the freezer and licked it but her tongue completely fell off the rotten smeghead lets pelt her with bricks from the local church with big bells on her forehead and mouldy titties flapped in the nuclear winter of 2007 after the predicted nuclear holocaust initiated by Guinea-Bissau with assistance from seventeen Lebanese earwigs Who then decided to blow up every British Embassy with fire turds which ignited the straw like barnet causing major disruption for worzel's hairpiece who then decided to find work as uncanny impersonators of the likes of Sasha and his infamous grin the bald headed bastard decided to give up DJing to finger cats At carlisle's finest corporately run shitholes which offer zero Puddings or pies but do include shit with egg and cum sorbet as an aperetif to killing yourself with a massive black rubber cock From Dubai which belongs to Luke along with fifteen biscuits made from salmonella and jam sprinkled with fresh siamese hen toes and dead manatees They taste great if you're ill due to horrific bacteria content which melts your face stuffed and wanted to... be extremely incoherent and got high or sooooooooooooooooooooooooo low you eat poptarts dipped in sweet baltimore prostitute moip scavenged from a dirty feckin Jew chasing contest in north western alabama that ended when all jews died when somebody accidentally flicked the switch to the gas the laughing gas it was hilarious and equally morbid like snails trackw but not slugs but not slugs said Fran twice the fucking mong never learned to say things once due to his hamster turret face and menacing protruding and menacing protruding arsehole was shown daily on BorderCrack'N'Deekaboot after he nonced fifteen dead atoms with his fist like carl cox during the world's biggest ever orgy with the Krankies and dinosaur fossils that went horribly wrong because of that fucking dwarf with hairy legs making a mess with blimming Veet before murdering the king alpaca, Jerome Robert Smith III Of the Cure tribute band called Hippy Shake Shake whilst feeling suicidal with ibuprofen caplets and eye make-up with false nails they weren't popular With the little Beasties that lived up inside the craggy black hole of grandma's arse which smelt horrible because she's old and slightly dead(I'm sure grandma pops up a disproportinate amount of times in this..) because of all the freakish sex grandad forces her into a threesome with two lizards and a monkey who stands watching taking pictures for Grandpops weekly magazine Monkey wank international printed on bananas then joins in taking lead role from the editor of the bible in the fiction section of woolies big bargain bin "binny reck-on" said the fucking wordsmith before being knifed for his twattish gold fallopian tubes which he won by sneaking urine up his nose in unceromonious fashion the greedy bastard then shagged ninety kids with a rolled up sock arrrgh said the gay, stunted Gypsy after emergency surgery on his bellend from excessive wanking into Michael Winner's soup and hair Winner the Cunt shouted Cliff Richard the Christian gobshite at the release of his arse hair workout DVD entitled 'Cinammon Jesus' (the bearded cunt) and cat raper proceeded to devour all the bongos and cauliflower cheese he'd used for horse whispering and donkey shouting before unkempt trainee florists beat the kids battered and fried for Edwards enjoyment the dirty royal drunken shambolic cunt learned his lesson by hanging himself from his cock (it's not going away...)piercing and testicles they leaked everywhere causing almighty problems with his waterworks end at United utilities main office hub of Satan the pedantic accountant who was crap at adding up the useless cunt his saving grace came wearing a big willy fighting outfit before being apprehended by a filthy little fucking cum guzzling whore who dribbled some goose far from Never Never Land on his tatties and dirty mash and pea pie pissing priceless peanuts paradoxically perfect pastors pushing pinapples perversly up the chimney of harbinger doom close to Swansea scabby jack bastards who shout obscenities to old ladies before bumming them on their birthday family get together filled with incest and bitter resentment and frozen peas after the fighting frozen quiche took a loaded pistol put it infront of the baby and then said i am not putting that up there, it stinks of our nanas freshly made sweet tasting fat swan and pickled ginger eqsuisitely packed kebabs onto a lorry heading for the mouths of starving albino turkish giraffes wearing short skirts made from the skins of racist people like Jim who also is a catholic priest who likes boys and touches them menacingly behind the vatican at night until the local police are bribed with cotton crucifixes and pissy water running from the legs of a dity school teacher after their colostomy burst due to excessive wanking in protest over the scandal involving many regular sperm donors giant fat mallet like fingers after a big bucket of frog piss was contaminated by the opening of a ripe old tomato that had rampaging seed aids caught having had one hell of a night in a Spaniard's bath filled with the man fat of Jose Feliciano and Bob Geldof's caravan peaches abused during fruit cocktail party wig wearing competitions many of which got burned because homosexuals are evil homosexuals are evil suggests never ending gobshite Graham Norton whilst taking length off of Sting the geriatric butler looking fucking twunt who sang many a repetitive song famously sue lawley fucked a monkey in the jungle Oo Oo Oo touch me there shouted Matthew Kelly undergoing a much needed punch in balls,because he touches kids when they are sleeping dreaming of a talent show nonce getting a taste of cummy spit flavoured mouth wash Leeds best seller in a competitive spunk drink marketplace saturated with inferior quality sperm substitutes extracted from the testicles of Jesus the anal retentive cleaning obsessive from the far reaches of Jo Brand's left arm folds that wobble notoriously during her act of self mutilation when witnessing Jimmy crack corn and Jimmy Carr's awful latest show the tedious banter of posh twat trying a gibbering fuckwit pleasing one liners but ultimately he will die horribly. in his filth found lying by a small child pointing and laughing at timmy mallots ridiculous continuing charade of pent up post modernist twatism and impotent rage he channels through his wonky vagina he wears around his mallet's tadger because dirty Albanians suck cheesy cocks and burp afterwards with sausage mist. Ulitimately, gayness was accepted by B.N.P sympathizer, Richard Skiddle :)lord of bottoms and single testiclism of Tupac Shakur the miserable rap packaging bag boy of ball bags who furiously ejaculated peppered pork loin before seeking medical attention from nurse with lubricating jelly on gloved hands of the lord jesus of nazareth who criticised religion for being shit and totally stupid amen. Praise the microbes, for they have sinned when teeth turn green and gums shine thou shalt not curse when wanking or even when liverpool fans speak, if they can. but they can't. this is due to a lack of intelligence and opposable thumbs, which inturn, caused gout and dillusions of farting rusty trombones that unleashed turmoil into the arena of wanton depravity featuring seventeen Portugese midget tapdancing dwarves who couldn't sleep after eating sodium coated ecstacy tablets with fruit and musky giblet toast and fish skiff washed down with shit and piss . Consequently this concoction was packaged 'Budweiser' and was hallucenagenic when consumed with bearded Daddy goats cheese and chive shavings from many an unsavoury snack . Mouldy piss stains happen when people live in tents for a weekend and take drugs beyond their limits and start crying that they want fisted in the armpit. Tim enjoys wanking too much , That is true! Dwarf discus happens when China allow spotty dogs cocks in their mouths the filthy mongs had something to eat, finally. However, it killed them because George Bush loves to kill that party feeling the Christian wanker and soup lover on amen breaks his own nose several times daily by headbutting concrete and punching himself quietly but happily. This was before fisting his granny in her arsehole and wrinkly clunge until they prolapsed raving fucking homos all over the equator, southern records have shown severe decline in the female brain capacity after many shoes were spolied with gallons of jizz which made squlechy fisting more difficult every other Wednesday. after cookery class for gay men was cancelled because of straight ladels causing absolute havoc among Azerbaijani royalty and their over the top mincing independant tribunal civil rights march over the mutilated corpses came to dancing like wankers theory of monkey sexing by J.R Hartly doddery auld fisherman catch the weirdest clam spunk kebabs for their fat reducing skin grater witch burning parades with thick 'cockneys' not having gravy for face colouring bowel movement accidents next to bins always happen when tramps start shouting "I shag pigeons" whilst fucking crows up the eye after spooning it up the wrong-un like minty loves watching on t'interweb fitlhy avian grumble self abuse sessions whilst sat on his mother's face , She had just eaten a curry out of shoes belonging to catholic hating priests, who became islamic fundamentalists inside a whale's mangled old hole but quickly realised god doesn't exist to crazy clubbers and rational people only complete morons. don't wear trousers and disregard punctuation like rule breaking benthic dwelling cyanobacteria suffocating the fish with steel lips

No. I now bring meaning to my world by trawling forums and fulfilling the wishes of the unwashed masses. Now I sleep..

(or alternatively.. of course.. i'm not a mentalist)

I only got half way before I could no longer neglect my assignment. But that is a work of literay genius! Well done all.

Explosions.

Spunk.

Cock.

Arse.

Fanny.

And Michael Winner are quite popular themes, it would seem!

Fucking hilarious. I am actually in tears with laughter. Does this mean the end??

Does it fuck.

Keep posting.

Ulitimately, gayness was accepted by B.N.P sympathizer, Richard Skiddle :)lord of bottoms and single testiclism of Tupac Shakur the miserable rap packaging bag boy of ball bags who furiously ejaculated peppered pork loin before seeking medical attention from nurse with lubricating jelly on gloved hands of the lord jesus of nazareth who criticised religion for being shit and totally stupid amen

By far my favourite bit

'The fruit-faced fuck shouted "shit bolloks" at the pope'

Genius

"Meanwhile, Keith Chegwin got really drunk stripped off naked & did the truffle shuffle like that bloke out of goonies before being arrested for bumming otters. The other cast now do porn but only at weddings and barmitvas for jewish goats Their act includes "the jimmy sideways" & sand lubricated anal beachball popping angst and painful misery plus some noshing. They even let martyn taylor in to drag rich away from the ugly bird with braces. "Don't cheat" cried the staypuff marshmallow man who was cheating by putting three fingers up his rusty sherriff's badge and screamed loudly "Only three fingers just fist me" Russell Grant was happy to."

"Winner the Cunt shouted Cliff Richard the Christian gobshite at the release of his arse hair workout DVD entitled 'Cinammon Jesus'"

"seventeen Portugese midget tapdancing dwarves who couldn't sleep after eating sodium coated ecstacy tablets with fruit and musky giblet toast and fish skiff washed down with shit and piss . Consequently this concoction was packaged 'Budweiser'".

Having now read it all, I think this is the funniest thing I've ever read!

Brilliant.

Good on ya TimL lad!

a vicar who abuses children and gets away with slapped wrists from the pope who bums jews and packs of cigarettes went to latvia & ate eggs from the latvian chicken farm which taught albanian counting to backward Turks while eating twats and being shat on once again in perfect unison the flags flew but the people were in-bred and moved to Slaggyford where flappy fannies ruled the streets & cock sure Neanderthals wearing clogs danced to medeival pan bashing & spoon bending evil For Halloween Ghouls

This whole thing should win the booker prize.